"AH!!! DID YOU CUT YOUR HAIR??"

This is the interesting sight I woke up to this afternoon. You really can't see it well in this picture, but she took her longer-than-shoulder length hair and chopped off 3-4 inches. In a series of moments that did not speak well for my attempts to be a calm, gracious mommy, I reacted poorly. We searched the house for the scissors she had used, but could not find them. So guess who got to use $.74 safety scissors to try to fix it?

Most of her hair. I cleaned up a load of it in the bathroom, thinking the (new) dog was stressing out or something. It took looking right at her to notice the chopped hair, as she left some long pieces in the front. I think the thing of it was that it had happened and then it looked like she lost the scissors, too. So I went ahead and did my best to fix it:

Her new haircut. It took a lot of trimming. I had to cut off at least 4 inches all over to even it up. At least she didn't make herself look like a boy! It took showing her that we could do cute things with pigtails and barrettes with it, but as you can see in the pic, we're all getting over it. Daddy came home from his meeting and it turned out he had my good scissors with him. So I did the last of the trimming and it does look okay. Thank goodness.

Well, clearly I have some catching up to do, I have not blogged about our new puppy or our recent vacation. So there'll be a couple new posts in the next couple days.

7 things in 7 years

Today is the 7th anniversary of the day I married the most incredible man I've ever met. In honor of that, I wanted to write something to show what I've learned about loving him. These are just a few. I wanted to write a list of 7 in honor of our seven years married, and these are the things that came to me first. So here you go. Enjoy.


7 Things I've learned in 7 years of marriage

*Disclaimer* Please know that in no way do I consider myself any kind of an expert. I am still learning how to love my husband, and he is still learning how to love me. And I look forward to learning more about him and loving him every day until 'death do us part.' These are just some things that I've picked up from the years I've spent learning about him, from some books I've read, from observing wise people in their marriages. And, it's in no particular order. The 'most important' isn't first, or last, because the 'most important' is going to be different for every marriage. And these are just tips. Just simple things that I've noticed make our relationship a little better, a little more loving. And they're all things I have to remind myself, or be reminded by God about, all the time. So take all this with a grain of salt. I just love learning about my own marriage and wanted to share some things I've learned.

1.When you're married, the other person's needs HAVE to come before your own. There is no 50/50 in marriage. You have to give 100%. Because, who's to say how much is 50%? You and your spouse are almost guaranteed to differ on that. So if one gives everything they have to the marriage, there is no question. They have devoted themselves fully and can't give any more.

2.When there is a disagreement, and you do some research or in some way find out you were in the wrong, have the guts, the humility, to admit the other person was right. I've discovered that even in the little things, such as a disagreement about where we saw something online, if I look it up and see I was wrong, it is much appreciated to say the simple words, “hey, look at that. I was wrong, and you were right!”

3.If you see something that needs to be done, do it. Who cares who left out the dirty dish? I'm headed to the kitchen, the dish is on my way there. I'm not going to strain anything picking it up. It doesn't prove anything to leave it out and hope the other person notices it eventually. In fact, in the long run it is a lot better for my pride (in the sense of lessening my pride) to take care of something FOR my spouse and do them a favor without expecting anything in return.

4.Show appreciation. All the time. If your spouse does something nice, even if it IS just taking care of a dirty dish, say “thank you.” Sometimes, all it takes to keep a happy marriage is to show that you see that the other person does things, even the things they're 'supposed' to do, and that you appreciate what they do.

5.Make it perfectly clear that you are just as attracted, if not MORE attracted, to your spouse as the day you met them. Simple words about how the person looks beautiful or handsome go a very long way. And then, as often as possible, use very strong words about this. Things like, 'gorgeous,' 'sexy,' 'incredible,' you know. That kind of thing. I'm sure you can figure it out. ;)

6.Pray for your spouse. Every day. As often as you think of it. Pray for things you know they're struggling with. Praise God for bringing this kind of love into your life. Pray for their walk with Christ. Pray for their parenting, if you have kids. Pray over their job, that it will be a happy, peaceful experience daily. And let your spouse know that you pray for them, every so often. It's very encouraging to know that the person closest to you brings you before the throne of God daily.

7.Say “I'm sorry” if you've done wrong. I don't care if it was as small as forgetting to put the toilet seat down, or as big as telling someone something you promised your spouse you'd keep secret. Or bigger! Or smaller. No matter what it was, if you've violated your spouse's trust, or done something that could hurt them, say sorry. It's so important that your spouse know that you value their feelings enough to care about it when you've hurt them. Not apologizing when you've done wrong tells your spouse that you don't care about how they feel. Too important to overlook.


Again, these are just things I've learned about loving my husband. They are all lessons I've had to learn, and I have to relearn ALL THE TIME. I get gentle and not so gentle reminders from God about this kind of stuff constantly. I'm still learning and growing, so this list is as much for me as it is for anyone who happens to read it.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Ugh, so hokey. I wonder how many blog posts have been named that. But unfortunately for my few blog readers, that's the title that came to me first, so there you go.

There are a few changes going on around here. We're refinancing our mortgage right now, which has involved a LOT of prayer lately. This re-fi required us to bring some money to the table, in the hundreds of dollars (which I know isn't a lot compared to most closing costs), which we don't usually have laying around. But God is good. We've had some check for refunds, tuition reimbursements, and a set of options all come through at the same time, and sort of unexpectedly. He is so good to take care of us.

Hubby's hours are changing right now too (we hope), as he and the 2 other TTL's who work with him are working out a rotating 8-hour/day schedule. This would mean he doesn't  have to work at 4:45 EVERY morning, just occasionally. And on the days he DOES work that early, he will also be able to be home much earlier. This is very, very nice for me, and nicer for him.

All three of our kids are currently in their Rec classes. They are all loving it. I'm hoping it stretches them a bit, helping them deal with different situations. The only issue (and it's a tiny one), is that S's class is in the evening, right over the time when we usually have supper. So we eat really early on the nights she has class, but again, it's a tiny issue. We figured it out.

Volleyball is ending. *sad* I wish it went all year. I would love that. But it does open up another weeknight, keeping me from having to run to one thing or another every night, like I have been for a couple weeks now.

Our anniversary is in less than two weeks! I already know what I want to get my hubby as a gift, but as updates for this blog are sent directly to his inbox, I can't say anything about it.  :P So there. We also get to go out with my parents this weekend. The kids are staying over night at my in-laws, and I cannot wait. I'm so excited to have my hubby to myself for a night. Yay!

Well, they aren't big changes, but there's the update. I've been thinking a lot about God's provision lately, for obvious reasons. We're very blessed that even with a lower paycheck than we've ever had before, God is providing for us in such a way that I can still take care of our kids, and we're able to save for things like Christmas and give to church and a family we know who is moving in to mission work. I love it. Thank you God.

Buzz, Buzz, Buzz

In my opinion, this is the perfect name for Google's new social network. 'Cause that's what it all is, isn't it? Just a fairly meaningless buzzing. Not that I scorn it or don't participate in any of it, but if you really step back and look, a lot of what gets posted is just that. Buzz. "I bought a new shirt today", "Just scooped some ice cream and I'm watching the olympics", and so on. We post this, and people comment.

There's good and bad about this, isn't there? It lets us keep in touch with so many more people. Hubby and I have good friends who are moving out of state soon, and we'll be able to keep up with them and the ministry they'll be doing in their new home soon. I know a couple people who are using a blog to post their readings of the bible and observations thereof. I follow a very famous blogger who is now using her blog as a ministry by talking through all the difficult things she and her husband have been through and what they've done to get through it, how they've leaned on God in many, many difficulties. There are good ways to use the internet, I know.

But then there's all those games and fluff. It has led many I know to take an 'electronic media' or 'social media' fast. It can take up a lot of time! I've gone there myself, to an extent. I've decided not to get my computer out when the kids are awake anymore; instead, I'll only do my online things (including banking and the like) when they're asleep or away. Sort of a half-fast, because I've noticed it taking away teaching and playing time between myself and my kids. And how am I supposed to live this part of my story, the stay-at-home-mom part, if I spend all my days online? I asked myself that today...

Anyway, all of that babble to come to my central point. I think there's a reason why all this Buzz draws us in. Why we have this desire to talk about every little thing that happens to us; to have our '15 minutes'. I'm reading a book by Donald Miller right now, it's called A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. It's very good. It speaks about how if we don't have a story to live, a conflict to resolve, a sacrifice to make, we're not really living. I think the draw of all this talking about ourselves is the need to feel like we're living our story.

Today in this book I read this: "I believe God wants us to create beautiful stories, and whatever it is that isn't God wants us to create meaningless stories, teaching the people around us that life just isn't worth living." Wow, huh? Maybe it doesn't affect everyone in this way, but for some of us, me included here, I think the internet is becoming this thing that will fill our lives with this noise, this Buzz, that crowds out our beautiful stories, the ones God wants us to live, and make us FEEL like we're living something important.

Tax Return

Hooray for tax season! I know, I'm totally insane, but when you don't have a lot of income and you do have a lot of kids and the husband of the family is in college and you own a home... you get a lot of money back. This is fantastic news for us because as little as Hubby made last year, he's making less this year. With this return we'll be closing the last 3 credit cards we had open (yes, we're growing up from being QUITE young and stupid), and paying for our 'new' used Expedition. We're signing S up for camp, A for more dance classes... taking care of a lot of things we would have trouble covering later.

So, it's a pain in the butt. It took me hours to file. But it's SO worth it to us. And it's more proof to me that our Daddy God is taking care of us every day.

Adjusting

Lately we've been adjusting to Hubby's new work schedule. Of course the biggest adjustment has been for him; he has to get up at 4:15 now to get to work before the 5:00 shift starts. He's in charge of a line in the factory where he works for the next 6 months. This is 2 hours earlier than he was used to getting up.

Thankfully, he enjoys the people he works with more than those he left, so even though he's tired from the early hours, he comes home happier and more relaxed than he did. That is nice for him.

I've been adjusting to it, too. I had been going to jog on my parents' treadmill at 6 in the morning (they live next door). Of course, now that Hubby isn't home at that time I can't go then. So now I have to hold on to my motivation until in the afternoon when he gets home. That's not quite as easy as rolling out of bed and going straight there before I can think about how I might not want to. Plus this week I've really been working to kick this cold, which hasn't been easy, so I skipped running for a week. We'll find out today if that set me back seriously or not.

And we've both been adjusting to an early bed time. We were used to some time after the girls go to bed to unwind, watch TV, go online, etc. Now we're trying to get to bed by 9:30. We're still in the process of figuring out how he can get his homework done, spend time with the girls, and unwind after they're in bed with less time to do it all. But it's only been a week, so we'll get it worked out.

I will say it's nice to see him earlier every afternoon. I love that.